One of my “not resolutions” New Year’s resolutions is to really get to know my friends. Since entering college, I’ve made so many more friends than I ever thought possible. It really is hard to keep track of them all, and at times I feel guilty for leaving people out simply because I don’t have enough time in the day to think about them. So, for 2015, I am pruning my friends, separating the acquaintances from the best friends, letting friendships go for people I’ve grown apart from, and strengthening relationships with people who I yearn to know more about. (Sidenote: If you are my friend and are reading this, please don’t think I’m “dropping” you as a friend. It is 99.99999% likely that I am not and that we will continue to be better friends by each passing day. Never fear, friend Leigh is here.)
I can know the “facts” of their life, their lists of favorites, what they want to do when they grow up, even horrible stories from their youth. But do I know the inner workings of their hearts? What makes them tick? Their deepest fears? If you’re hoping to strengthen relationships in 2015, here are a few uncomfortable questions you should ask your friends to get to know them better.
P.S. Don’t forget to share your answers too, so that they can do the same.
- What is one thing you’re insecure about?
- Who inspires you the most?
- What is your deepest wish in the world?
- Why are we friends?***** This one questions an entire friendship and causes you both to seriously think about whether a friendship is destructive or boosting to both individuals.
- Are you happy with your life?
- Do you have any regrets?
- Where do you see yourself (honestly) in 10 years?
- What are you most afraid of?
- What is a character trait you wish you had?
- What characteristic are you most proud of?
- What is your deepest guilty pleasure?
- What is one thing that no one knows about you?
- What is one thing that’s hard to admit to yourself?
- What brings you the most joy?
- What’s your favorite part of the day?
I love asking questions and being asked questions alike, so use these to guide your next conversation with a friend, whether it’s a friend you wish to be better friends with or if it’s a friend you feel you have drifted apart from. Take the initiative and strengthen that friendship to make 2015 the year of the friends.